Hemmed In Adopts: Part II

National Adoption Awareness Month continues, and so do the Adoption-related posts! if you missed Part I, it's right here.

This week I dive into the biggest question in adoption:
Why? Why adopt? We've fielded that question a lot throughout the process. And still do, now that we have an adopted son.
That question is probably answered as many different times as there are different adoptive families; everyone's journey is unique, and their reasoning, while probably similar, is ultimately unique as well.

---

For us; it was as simple as seeing the number of children in need and feeling God's calling to enter that need through adoption. (There's plenty more ways to be part of meeting the need of vulnerable or orphaned children without adopting, but that's for another post!)

While I had always envisioned myself adopting children since I was a teenager, my husband was really the one that lead the charge for our family. And he did so with 3 main guidelines, if you will:

1. We felt God calling us to pursue adoption

To be clear, we'd always talked about it, even before marriage or having our daughter biologically. But it's one thing to talk about it in "someday" conversations, and quite another to feel like your heart is pulled that direction without your prompting. And it's certainly bigger than any one family or organization. Adoption is a gigantic ball of chaos that no one goes into thinking "I got this! It's a good idea, sounds great, I'm in." Call it a passion, a calling, a hardwired desire. It consumed our thoughts and plans for the future. We knew we were being moved by something greater than our little family's dreams. Infertility helped us, in a way. The longer it went without any explanation, the more confirmed we felt in pursuing adoption. Like God was keeping us available for the children He had planned for us along. And yet, we knew very clearly that...

2. We have no "right" to a child through adoption

We entered this process not knowing what, or whom, it would lead to. While you're invested heart & soul, there's no guarantees, no promises that it'll end with a slightly larger family in the annual Christmas card photo. God called us to say Yes and join Him in caring for children, and we trusted that He'd use us as He saw fit. We had several placements fall through, and every time were reminded that if nothing else, we had an opportunity, a responsibility, to pray for these families. If our lives only intersected for a fleeting moment in time, what were we going to do in that time? We were there for a reason, and if it was simply to pray for the preservation of + provision for their family, then that's what we would do. But still, as my husband reminded myself and others frequently...

---

3. We are in no way the 'rescuers' in this story

God rescues. We enter in, as He leads, to His work in this. We get a lot of "oh, you're such a good family to do that." or "oh, he (our son) is so lucky." I beg to differ. We're not 'good' because we adopted a child. We're loved by a good God that called us to be a conduit of His goodness in the life of a child. And our son isn't lucky; he's wildly loved by his family and by his Heavenly Father. If luck were ever a part in this, it'd be us that are the lucky ones getting to raise him & enjoy him for a lifetime!

---

Do you know of an adoptive Mom? Or "expecting" adoptive Mom? Ask her: why adoption? What led you here? Believe me, just talking about her story is so helpful and necessary for her. Enter into it with her, ask questions, start to understand her unique journey.
And make sure she knows she's a good Mom with a card or canopy :)
Part III coming next week; just in time for National Adoption Day. Stay tuned!